Sometimes I Cry.
Written by Gerald Crabb.
Gerald Crabb has won songwriter of the year 9 consecutive years in a row, according to the SGMA (Southern Gospel Music Association) in addition to many other awards for his songwriting. He has had over 25 songs reach #1 on the charts. As well as having written songs for the Gaither Vocal Band, The Perry’s, Jeff and Sheri Easter, the Freemans and of course his award-winning family, The Crabb Family. Gerald Crabb is quick to tell you he is a blessed man, and while the awards are nice and recognition for his songwriting ability is appreciated he is quick to tell you that he is just the holder of the pen and that all glory and credit goes to the Lord.
Before I get to the story behind the song Sometimes I Cry let me share with you a backstory about the interview.
For several months I had been attempting to interview Gerald and it just seemed we could not get together. I had almost given up that the interview would take place and then out of the blue one morning I get a call from Gerald, unplanned and unscheduled. He had 30 minutes to give me before he had another appointment. I literally was walking out the door to head to work but realizing this may be the only opportunity I had to talk with him I stopped and did a quick set up for the recording and found a note pad. We started off making small talk, had the interview, then said goodbye and I was off to my day job. In all honesty, I did not give much thought at the time about what we had talked About. Doing the interview put me behind schedule and for the rest of the day it seemed I was late for every appointment.
I work as a home inspector by trade and the last home I had to inspect that day was in Speedwell, Tennessee, a good 75 miles from where I live. I arrived at the location and my customer was not home. I just figured I would reschedule. Just as I was preparing to leave the customer’s grandmother, who lived next door, approached me to see if she could help me. We talked for a moment and one thing lead to another and somehow we got on the subject of the Lord. I shared with her about my blog and some of the artist I had interviewed. I had mentioned to her that I was excited to get home to tell my wife about my interview with Gerald Crabb.
I began to share with her his story of Sometimes I Cry and as I did she began to weep. She shared with me that her 39-year-old daughter had passed away 4 years ago from breast cancer. As she told me about her broken heart, tears ran down her face. She said that she was a faithful member at the church down the road and yet it seemed there was no one for her to share her pain and grief with. She said she went every time the doors were open and yet she sat there Sunday after Sunday hurting. As we talked I encouraged her to reach out to others in her church and to let them know her pain. During the course of our conversation, her husband came home from work and I began to share him my story. As we talked he also began to weep as he talked about his pain as well.
What should have been a 10 or 15-minute visit turned into over an hour conversation. I thanked them for their time, wished them well and packed my things to leave while they walked back into their house. I had already turned my car around and was pulling away when she came running out of her house, up to the car. She said, I know you will think I’m crazy, but I have just got to hug you. She said that she had woke up that morning very discouraged and depressed and had prayed for the Lord to send her some encouragement. She said no doubt the Lord had sent me to her because for the first time in weeks she didn’t feel sad and lonely and the things I had shared with her were just what she and her husband needed to hear. I, of course, got out of the car and hugged her and thanked her for her kind words. It was nothing I had done, I was just the one the Lord used to bless her.
This just goes to show you that Lord will bring things together in his time in order to bless and others.
Sometimes I Cry. Songwriter, Gerald Crabb. Release by Jason Crabb.
As I spoke with Gerald from his Mississippi home, he began to share with me how his song, Sometimes I Cry, was formed. “I was inspired by another song, it was just a simple laid-back kind of song. But it got me to thinking about how we as church people are sometimes so pretentious and hypercritical in the fact that we act as if we have it all together”. We act as if we don’t have any worries and not a care in the world, when in fact we are struggling inside. I don’t know one Christian that does not fight the same battles; the same devil that I fight. I have yet to find anyone who has the victory 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. We are in this old world and the word of God even tells us that the life of a Christian is not going to be easy, it says, “In this world you will have troubles” (John 16:33). Yet we go around trying to make believe we are somehow shielded, while on the inside we are hurting and secretly crying.
Gerald says as he began to write the song he thought of all the “church-ie” things we do in order to put on the right kind of face, like: acting the part, blending in with the church crowd, knowing where all the bible studies are, knowing the preachers around town and even having a Christian bumper sticker on the back of our cars. All examples of what we think is a good Christian. We know all the clichés to use in the body of Christ to mask our pain and hurt, but as he states sometimes we hurt and sometimes we cry, and that’s okay. We are not expected to have it all together, we sometimes need to learn that it’s okay to share our pain with other believers as well as with the Lord. In Galatians 6:2, it tells us to bear one another’s burdens. A true friend will do just that.
Another thought that I drew from, Gerald adds, when writing this song, I thought about Jesus after the resurrection and his disciples were sort of in hiding. When he appears to them they are not sure what to make of it. The bible tells us they were terrified and afraid and thought he was a spirit. But it took him showing them his scars before they understood it was really him. I like to believe it took them seeing the scars, the nail prints in his hands and feet to know it was him. I’m sure it changed the mood in the room once they knew it was him, I’m sure they were touched and moved by the scars. I thought if Jesus should his scars to help others in their unbelief then we too should be ok with showing our scars and tears
As he finished telling the story Gerald tells how when he first wrote the song he would sing it to other preachers. “I am a minister, I considered myself a preacher’s preacher and as I would sing this song they would open up and cry because so many could relate to it. As a pastor or preacher, there is an expectation that we have it together and never face sorrows, but we have the same struggles as everyday folk, we are no different than anyone else. But I wanted to get the message out that it is okay to hurt and it’s okay to cry and not to bottle up those feeling. Years ago, a gentleman told me, Christians aren’t supposed to cry and that statement always stayed with me. But the truth is that’s not the case, the Lord gives us tears so our heads won’t swell. If we can just remember to take these worries and troubles that bother us to the Lord and trust he will take care of them, then everything is going to be okay.
Sometimes I Cry was Nominated for Song of the Year at the 2011 Dove Awards. Also at the 2011 Dove awards, Gerald won Songwriter of the Year.